Find by tag

Gore rezvidzidzo - GREC

Anyway dear group members be informed kuti muchambondishaya kwekanguva pagroup apa ndahaiwa neve GREC kuseta mamidyear test.  Kune varasika GREC  yakamirira Gore Rezvidzidzo Examination Council!

grade 7 shona exam - hawairevesa tina

Grade 7 Shona exam:

Hawairevesa Tina......?????
Pedzisa negitare rakakodzera.
A.dhiriri tinti
B.tiri tiri titi
C.dhiriri ndi tintii
D.giri ngi kinkiiiii

dressed chiken

Nhai hama, zvariri gore rezvidzidzo, ndiziviseiwo kuti Sei Huku yakaundurwa ichinzi Dressed
Chicken?

Shangu pa road test

Wotopa munhu bhutsu kuti akusonere. 
Wozoona akadzipfeka pa bottle store...
Wobvunza kuti "ko zviri kumbofamba sei nebhutsu dzangu???"
Wotoudzwa kuti dziri pa "Road Test"

Mbavha ndeipi apa?

Ndiani mbavha apa:
Mukomana aitengesa hove 3.3 kgs achida $10. Mdara wemota obva amira achida hove akati isa kuboot wouya kuzotora mari. 
Mkomana obva oisa hove pasi pemota ovhara boot, Mdara obva atiza asina kubhadhara achiti hove dzaamo!!!! 

So mbavha ndeipi

type dzevanhu pa whatsapp

  • Bete - vano bhowa kuona vachinzi typing...
  • Nhunzi  - vane noise havanyarari,  anoita morning katwo-two
  • Gonye -  ukaona a typer i nonsense chete, anovava, naturally sends boring texts dzisina respondent
  • Kamba - ava ndovanoseka joke yaZuro,, nhasi senyowani,,,, type dziya dzino forwarder nyaya yeLast year
  • Nguruve - ava ndovaya vema 'kkkkk' havana zvavanonyora zvine msoro
  • Gonzo - ava ndovasingadi kuti vamwe vafadze pagroup, vanoisa joke yavo, yevamwe isati yasekwa
  • Murondatsimba - ava vanomirira kuti vamwe vaComente ivo vozongoita saizvozvo, ndo vana Amen
  • Datya - ava vanobhowa vano texter kamwe pamwedzi

huya tiverenge mari

Murume: Huya kuno
Mukadzi: Kunei
Murume: ita zvandataura bvisa bhurugwa
Mukadzi: Ndabvisa
Murume: Chiuya pano pamubhedha
Mukadzi: Ndauya
Murume: Chindibatsirawo kuwerenga mari
Mukadzi: Saka bhurungwa rangu ndabvisirei
Murume: Ungazondibira mari yangu uchiisa mubhurugwa

Farirai kugeza madzimayi

Manga muchizviziva here kuti mukadzi paanoti kumuporofita imba yangu ikunetsa murume haasikurara kumba chero bonde neni haachadi madzibaba voti oyi muteuro uyu mogeza 6days katatu pazuva anenge atoona kuti dambudziko riri pakugeza .

Tiri mugore rezvidzidzo

Ma status epa whatsapp

MaWhatsapp status evamwe:
1)I love u but ndibatisise coz ndakawandirwa.
2)Game yachinja shiri yabvuta rekeni
3)Handifarise zvekukangira muyenzi nzungu dzembeu
4)Ukandivinga nebag redzungu unowana ndakakugarira nebhero remanyawi 
5)usandi taste nechigunwe senhanga
6)usandiitire dzungu sera  Pharaoh kuyambuka gungwa raasina kupatsanura
7)Dai huku yaiziva kuti inonaka yaifamba ichimodhela
8)Hatitambe tese kana ndaimbotamba newe huya utore magaba ako
9). Handichengete godo handisi cooler box 
10).gore rino munondionera padenga se tv yekubhawa

Dai kwakatanga kusikwa maChina

Dai mwari vakatanga kusika rudzi rwemaCHINA, chivi chekutanga chisina kumbovapo,  instead yekuti vadye muchero vaidya nyoka yacho,  tingadai tisina nhamo yese iyi!

Ndezve kubhawa zviya

Is this good??I visited ma doctor and he gave me some treatment and medicines .he also advised me to stop drinking beer. later in the evening I went to the bar and bought myself a fanta drink.while I was drinking I saw ma doctor drinking beer and he came to me and said""ko hauchamwa beer why?oo mari iyi piwa koti""and I said""doctor makanganwa here kuti ndini wamati  chimbomira zvehwa
hwa”"and he said"""aaah iwe! ndezvekubasa zviya kuno kubhawa ngatnwei"kwakutenga beer kwakunwa..the next day I wasn't feeling well so I had to go back to ma doctor!"""doctor ndarwara!"" I said to him""""ko chiii futi“"" he asked"doro riya ramakati ndinwe nezuro"and he answdered""""aaah ungateedzera zvekubhawa iwe  uchirwara?ndezvekubhawa zviya!unofa ukazviteedzera!""ndakaita weak!

Type dzevanhu vepa whatsapp

Type dzevanhu vepa whatsapp:

1. Mr/s NYADZISAI. 
Ava havana chimwe chavanofunga kunze kwekutumira zvinyadzi. Kana vava kuda kutaura zvinemusoro vanotoita zvekufona chaiko. Shame !!!

2. Mr/s FOWARD.
Chese chasvika paari anotonzwa kuti dai angoforwader. Zvingava zvaMwari kana zvana Mai Nyadzisai anongofowarder chete. Makuhwa ndopamusha pawo ipapa. Zvakakuomerai veduwe.

3. SEKURU NAAMBUYA NDIONEI.
Kana vari ava iiii ndavatadza. Hameno akavanyebera kuti vakatsvuka kana kuti vakanaka ndiani. Basa kuchinja maprofle pic every day. Tinokuziva kuti ndiwe Mary , Simba, Chipo kana kuti Peter nyangwe pasina pic. kkk zvimwe unonyanya.

4. ZVICHEMO.
Kana ari uyu anotori neshavi chairo.Chese chaitika mulife yake anototi aise paStatus. Hee ndarambiwa, hee handina mari, Mwari vakukomborere, hee apa pangu ,ichi changu. Taneta nezvichemo zvako tinadzowo nhamo dzedu asi takanyarara.

4. DOCTOR IGNORE.
Ava ndikutofunga kudelater nhamba dzavo. Kuvamhoresa vari online havapindure . Kana watoita lucky i one word answer. Havafe vakatanga kuti ndeipi.

5.SEKAI. 
Uyu anotopenga chete. Mhinduro dzake ma kkkkkk chete even asati averenga anenge ato typer maK kudhara.

6.SHATRICIA.
Kkkk idzi ndidzo shasha dzekushata. Hapana kana zuva one raanomboisa pic rake . Nhasi Beyonce mangwana Rhiana .Sory

7. SHYLET.
Very shy nepawatsapp pese .Haafe akataura nyaya yake nekunyara. Basa kucommenta kuti nyc profile pic but iye achida kuti i luv u ..aaa unozviruza apa

8. MR/S RIGHT.
Muvangwarire ivava. Ukadanana naye a nogara akaisa pic rako paProfile kuti usaita dzungu. Isu tinenge tichitoudzwa kuti aaa mutwin brother wangu, hee ndiSekuru .ko ndozobvunzirei zvakawanda kana ndachansa ,ndogodyawo ndakanyarara. Ukapusa anokuvhara achidyisa munda wese nesu makudo asingatyi kusheya.kkkkk

9. MR CAREFUL. 
Ava vakatopenga .u never know kuti chii chirikuitika pavari. Haafe akaisa pic yelover yake parofl. They are somehow clever coz havangoise ise. Ko akakuisa nhasi mangwana morambana anozoita sei.? Anenge akutorambiwa zvichinzi kowawaimboisa aripi.

10. Mr/s ONLINE.
Ava havambotorara kana kugeza chaiko. Ndivo vakaimbiwa naNox always online.

kubhadharana pa hotera

Mai Tindo was driving, semunhu anga aneta ndobva vatsvaga Hotera yangairipedyo. After 3hrs vamuka vakuda kuenderera mberi nerwendo vakasvika pacounter kuti vabhadhare:
Mai T: How much kurara kwandaita?
Cashier: $250
Mai T: Ahh yakawandisa, deedzai manager!
..Manager comes...
Manager: Ehe ndizvo. 250 because tine maSwimming pool munomu.
Mai T: Handina kuswimma ka ini?
Manager: Imi maregererei? Plus tine vaimbi, tourist attraction, maSports akasiyana siyana
Mai T: Panezvese hapana chandaona ndanga ndakarara
Manager: Maregererei? Hanti manga muri muno zvenyu.
..Mai T vanobudisa chikwama chavo vobhadhara $50..
Manager: Ko imwe $200?
Mai T: Ndakubhadharisai kurara kwamaita neni!
Manager: Handina kurara nemi...!!!
Mai T: Hanty ndanga ndiri muno? Saka maregererei?

vanhu vakabvepi?

Little girl asks her mom, "nhai mhamha, vanhu takabva kupi?"
Mum, "vanhu vakatanga vari makudo. Ndokubva vatanga kushanduka zvishoma kusvika vave vanhu, muchazvidzidza kuchikoro."
The little girl wanted a better elaboration from her father and she asked him. 
"Nhai daddy vanhu vakabva kupi?"
Dad - "Munhu akasikwa namwari. Kwakatanga kusikwa Adam naEve, ndivo vakazobereka vanhu vese". 
Daughter - "ko inga mhamha vati vanhu vakabva kumakudo?"
Dad - "Ini ndakuudza kwakabva family yedu, mhamha vako vakuudza kwakabva family yavo."

zrp accident report

Pane motokari yerudzi rwesando (hammer) yaroverana ne nhatu mbiri nhatu (323). Paita yemushana (sunny) yapotsa yapindawo mune yekuoma mutezo(hardbordy) . Pasina nguva mandimba akasvika neyekudzivirira(defender)

Get nyambo in your inbox!