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World Cup yenhodo?

Imwe tsanoz yangu yakaenda Joza 1999 yakadzoka ikozvino, ndatoiperekedza kuChitungwiza yanga yakurasika apo kucomplainer non-stop, tichitenderera mumaraini yazondibvunza,"ko nhai asi kuno kwaitambwa world cup yenhodo muroad kuita so many potholes?"

Ndouya nemakonzo mangwana

Ndini uyo kufamba hangu muOld Highfield ndobva ndaona umwe blazo zvikanzi:
 "mukoma ndirikutengesa kitsi iyi inokwanisa kubata makonzo ese ari pan'anda penyu irikuita $2 chete". 
Ini nekusada kutengeserwa chidhuura ndikati thanks wangu ini hangu handina makonzo kumba kwangu, zvikanzi 
"haisi horror stereki mukaitenga nhasi mondipa address yenyu mangwana chaiwo ndouya nemakonzo acho".

musango donha donha

Hanzi pane mufesi asungwa aonekwa achidonha mutwn akanzi ukutedzera president

Ndiri weku Traffic

Pastor vakasvika nepaZRP ndokuona officer vachirava bible. Zvakavakatyamadza vakati, whaat! Mapurisa anoravawo magwaro nhai? Vakabvunza simple qstion yemubhaibheri vakati: "nhai officer ndiani pakati paCAIN naABEL akauraya munin'na wake?"

Officer ndokuti "Pastor bvunzai constable varimucharge office ndovanodealer nedzeMurder, ini ndiri weku Traffic!"

ma results abuda...

ndirikubva kunotora maresults kuchikoro. Hazvina kumbomira mushe.

English. E

Maths. U

Accounts U

Facebook. B

Whatapp. A

kana maroorana zvino pinduruka

VASATI VAROORANA:
# John.... Ndikuona seuri kunonoka
# Mary.... Urikuda kuti ndiende?
# John.... Usafunge izvozvo
# Mary .... unondida here?
#John.... Zvakanyanya
#Mary.... wakambo danana nemumwe munhu here tiri tese?
#John.... kwete.
#Mary.... Uchagara neni nguva dzose here?
#John.... Nguva dzose ndikawana mukana
#Mary.... Uchandirova here?
#John.... kwete!
#Mary.... Ndovimba newe here?
#John.... Yeah!
#Mary.... mudiwa wangu....


VAZOROORANA: Verengai muchibva kuzasi kuenda kumusoro!!

2032 history question

History Exam 2032 
Pindura mibvunzo yese

1.Mugore ra2015 chii chakadonha?
A . Zim dollar 
B . Ndege yekuMalaysia
C . Munhu

2.Chakodonhera payi?
A .Pastock exchange
B .Mugungwa
C .Parukukwe rwutsvuku

3.Zvinofungidzirwa kuti chii chakakonzeresa?
A .Huori
B .Kuvhuvhuta kukuru kwemhepo
C .Aaah makore afamba.

musoro musoro

Enock: Imarii kugerwa?
Barber: $3.
Enock:  Ahh nemhanza iyoyi???
Barber:  Mudhara msoro msoro!!
Enock:  Horaiti ndigerewo DHINO
Barber:  Haa mdara nemhanza yamuinayo iyi
Enock:  Mfana msoro msoro gera wakanyarara

boys dze chamba

Vamwe varume vakanga vakadhakwa nechamba zuva rose. Sha itatichirova kekupedzisira tirare. Enda unokumbira matches panaJoice vasati varara. Aah shaa ndadzoka vatihavana. Hoo saka matches yanetsa dzima candle tirare tozviona mangwana

chinoz - zita riri mu fashion

Journalist : Nhai vaChinotimba, kana Bona abatsirwa mwana munofunga timupe zita rekuti ani? Toda zita riri mufashion. 
Chinoz: Zvirikumbofambaseiishe.

Unomwa here

Mukoma Joe vakanotora zvavo bhebhi kubhawa ndokuuya naro, bhebhi rikabvunza mukoma Joe kuti: "Ko unomwa here?" Joe akati," ndinomwa heavyyyy."

Vaviri ava vakavata husiku hwese vachitandadzana pasina protection, ndokuzoti kwaedza bhebhi ndokutanga kunwa zvaro maARV.

Mukoma Joe ndokuti, "Bhebhi haudarozve! Seyi usina kundiudza kuti uri positive." 
Bhebhi rikati ,"handiti ndakakubvunza kuti unomwa here ukatoti heavyyy"

Mathew 7 v 7

Themba akanzwa kuti kune pungwe kuZCC akati regai ndimbonoona kuti kwakamira sei, achisvika akawana mufundisi achiti yave nguva yekuzorora chimborarai zvishoma. Sezvo kwaitonhora Temba akatanga kutsvaga angamubatsira kuti adziirwe. Themba akafunga kutsvaga zvihunhi, achingoti fambei kubva pavanhu akaona vamwe sisi vachiwaridza ndokukumbira gumbeze ndokunzi huyai mupinde sezvo paive pagungano ramwari hapana chakaipa chaifungirwa. Akati adziirwa ropa rakatanga kumhanyamhanya Themba ndokutsvanzvadzira garo rasisi, sisi vaya ndokuti Metthew 7 v 7. Achinzwa izvi Themba akazeza akasiya , garegare akapamha sisi ndokdzokorodza Metthew 7 v 7. Kwaedza Themba akatenda ndokuenda zvake. Kuzoti aveega akavhura vers riya ndokuwana richiti kumbira unopihwa. Naizvozvo hama yangu ziva shoko ramwari usazo potswa nezvinonaka

hure iri rasiyana nemamwe

Man going kuBhawa nemukadzi wake kunotandara vachimwa murume ndokuenda kutoilet mukadzi asara rimwe hure ndokuti utange wapiwa mari murume iyeye haabhadhari uye haadi condom mukadzi ndokungoti hoo ndokuuya vamwe two futi vachitaura same statement murume achingopinda kubva kutoilet akawana mukadzi atotsamwa ndokusvikonzi hande tonopedzerana tave kumba vachongonopinda muTax mukadzi ayingopenga dzamara tax driver ati hure raurinaro nhasi rinopenga rasiyana nemamwe aunosimbouya nawo.

Omo ne Surf zvinoburitsa furo here

Mwana muClass:

"Sir, ko tika mixer Omo ne Surf washing powder panobuda furo here?

Teacher: "Yes panobuda furo, handidi zvikubvunzwa zvisina basa makuseni so mhani"

Mwana achizevezera munzveve yeClassmate yake: "What a stupid answer panoita furo cei isu tisati taisa mvura UMMMM TICHAFOIRA GORE RINO"

Tsamba ku mukwasha

Tsamba kumukwasha.

Anodiwa mukwasha Todd.Ndinotenda chose negirosari ramakatitengera bt mukaka uya unonzi Handy Andy watikuwadza nemanyoka tinovimba kt mudumbu mavhunduka chirungu, hupfu huya hunonzi Vim hausi kutsengeka zvakanaka asi totenda kuti wakati mbembe kuchena, madhuringi anonzi Sunlight irikupupuma neMukwa haasi kutapira takutowedzera shuga, kozoita tsotso dziya dzinonzi Spaghetti dziri kunanauka ukadziisa pachoto.

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