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Ndiyani aisa wivhi mu bhegi mangu

Bofu rakagara mubhazi ndokubva ragara paseat rikaisa mwana waro pamakumbo,bag paseat saka mubhazi makapinda chidhakwa ndokubva chabvisa bag chikagara ndokubatwa nehope. Bofu pane zvarakanga roda kutora mubag rikatsvangadzira ndobva ravhura zipi yebhurugwa rechidhakwa rikapinza ruoko. Rikatanga kupopota ndiani aisa mabanana, matomatoes ne wivhi mubag mangu.

Shingi aiva mubarber achigerwa zvake ndokubva awona mumwe mukadzi akanaka chaizvo achitsvaira mubarber mubarber umu.
Tonde: ende sisi makanaka
Mukadzi: maita basa
Tonde: do you mind if i take you out after work
Mukadzi: but i am married
Tonde: you can tell your husband kuti unenge wanonoka kupedza basa
Mukadzi: ok muudzei mega ndiyei arikukugerai

kurovero door re kombi

umwe blazo akapinda mukombi kwakurovera doo, achivhara zvikanzi na hwindi:

 ''nhai mudhara fridge  yekumba kwenyu munorovera saizvozvo here?", zvikanzi na blazo: 

"handisati ndamboivhara ndirimukati!"

Sei uchigara wakandi siya

Paiva nematwins mukomana nemusikana kana vakatumwa kumashops vaienda vachimanya saka kasikana kaigara kachingosiiwa umwemusi vachigezesiwa kasikana kakatarisa kukakomana, kakati aah ndosaka uchindisiya unekagiya

Ndiyani wa drawa magaro pa board?

Ticha watsva pachikoro vakadrawer human heart paboard kwakubvunza vana kuti chii?. Vana wese waingoti magaro. Ticha nehasha akamhanya kwaheadmaster kwakusvikomuudza kt vana varikumudheerera. Head haana kubvunza zvakawanda. Vakabva vaenda vese kuclass zvikanzi nahead ko imi vana sei muchidheerera madam imi. Vana vakati hatina kumbowadheerera. Nehasha zvikanzi nahead kana musiri kudheerera saka adrawer magaro paboard apo ndiani??

Vano tiitira zvakanaka kwazvoo

Mumwe mudzimai had a screensaver paphone yapastor wekuchurch kwavo. The husband was not happy and told her to remove the screensaver. Madam vakaramba arguing kuti
ndivo pastor vedu and vanotiitira zvakanaka.

The next day the husband came ane screensaver yemumwe musikana paphone pake and the wife asked ko ndiani uyu.  The man responded:

"Paya pamunenge muchiitirwa zvakanaka napastor ava ndivo vanenge vachitiitirawo zvakanaka. Ndivo barlady vekwatinomwira. Vanotiitira zvakanaka kwazvo."

Handi bhadharwe overtime

Vamwe officer vaidzinganisa mbavha. Vaapedyo nekuibata vakabva vamira, vanhu vaitera vakasvikomirawo vakabvunza officer kuti mamirirei manga makuibata wani. Zvikanzi na officer 4 dzachaya ndapedza basa handibhadharwe overtym.

Ndabika zvamuno farira

Wife : dady kasikai kuuya kumba nhasi ndabika zvamunofarira chaizvo. 
Husband : wakatanga riinhi kugona kubika LION LAGER.

Pakati penyu muri vaviri...

Mudhara akasvika kumba wife namaid wakagara hawo. Wife ndiye akatanga 

Wife: Maswera sei daddy? Daddy ziii.
Maid: Maswera seiko baba? Mdhara zii.
Wife: Ahh ko zvaitaseiko nhai baba mwana. Kwakanaka here?
Daddy: kuchinaka chii, pakati penyu muri two pane akandipa siki...

Vanhu veku church vane nharo!

Umwe mudhara akabva kubhawa akadhakwa ndokubva ati kumukadzi ndipeiyiwo bhabheri mukadzi ndokuita saizvozvo. Mudhara ndokuvhura munaMatthew achibva ati yaah vanhu vane nharo mangwana kana moenda kuchurch musandisiye. Ava mangwana akabatana nemukadzi vavekusvika pano pesana nzira yekubhawa nekuchurch akatora bible akananga kubhawa zvikanzi ndoda kunopedza nharo ndakavaudza kuti pakati matthew pana double T

Tangai manzwisisa ma instructions

Mambo vakakokorodza vanhu vakati "Anenge abvisa shumba zino rayo ndiye achabvisawo mwana wangu humhandara."


Shumba yanga yakavharirwa mumba mazuva mashanu isina kudya. Majaya emudunhu
akaedza vese vakafiramo. Mambo akadaidzira kuparara kwemusangano. Kamwewo kamudhara kaitobva kumunda kakabvunza zvaiitika kakanzi kana muchida pindai muneshumba umo kakatsanangurirwa katove mukati.


After 10 minutes dze noise nekuchema mudhara akabuda sweating and tired zvikanzi, "Shumba ndabvisa humhandara musikana anoda kubviswa zino arikupi?"

Nhamo yemuroora

Nhamo yemuroora:

Aite mudiki - Haa kakanyanya kuita kadiki, kachamuhurira

Akure - Mukadzi uyu mukuru achamutonga.

Anyarare - Mukadzi waGoddie akati kwindi.

Ataure - Akachenjeresa pamuromo pake hapamharwe nenhunzi.

Awonde - Mukati Goddie haana kutitorera murwere imi? 

Asimbe - Ringatadze nei kufuta richiswera rakangoti pweshe? 

Agare natete - Akatorera mwana wangu Angela kuti amuite musikana webasa.

Arambe kugara natete  - Haridi vanhu kumba kwaro kunge ndiro rinoshanda.

Abikire muenzi tea - Asi anopenga nhai imi? Tea, isu taswera nayo kudai?

Abike riri sadza - Zvakaoma asikana, munhu wandanyatsoudza kuti ndamukira bhazi? Ari kuti tea ndainwira kupi?

Abvunze kuti ndokubikirai chii?  - Kunyima ka uku, mweni anobvunzwa?

Atumire vana kumusha - Ho, isu tisu tisina zvekuita, atumira vana kuti iye asare achibatei?

Arege kutumira vana - Ah, anomboda kuti vana vake vauye kuno? Pamwe zvinonzi tingazovaroya.

Agare mazuva mashoma kumusha - Maiwe kanomboda zveruzevha? Nungo dzega dzega

Agarise kumusha - Anotozoenda ameka shuwa kuti tushuga twaakauya natwo twapera.

Atambe chiramu nababamunini - Matambiro ake naSydney ndeechihure. Achatibatira mwana takatarisa. 

Arambe kutamba chiramu - Mukati haana zisekuru rakamugara? Munhu asingadi kana kugumwa nemuramu wake?

Atumire grocery - Anoziva sei zvandisina? Adii kutumira iri mari ndatenga ndega?

Atumire iri mari  - Shuwa munhu anonyatsoziva kuti kuno zvinhu zvinodhura asi ndopaanotumira mari, adii kutenga ikoko otumira riri grocery?

Ashaure panhamo - Aiwa kuvhengezera tinokuziva isu, apa kuimba kwacho haakugone.

Anyarare panhamo - Iii, makaonawo makwindimariro aainge akaita parufu rwasekuru Agripa akati dzvondo kutarisa chitunha?

Auye kuzobikawo doro nevamwe kumusha  - Zvakaoma munhu wechurch anosanganisa

Arege kuuya - Haadi kubatirana nevamwe.

Aite tsika - Ummm mukati haana kumbenge akaroorwa kumwe iyeye? Zvese izvi anozvizivira kupi?

Arege kuita tsika - Haana kana kurairwa.

Answer in Brief

vamwe Cde  was writing an examination in an exam room he took off all his clothes and was left with a pant when the invigillater saw him naked like that he asked Cde ko zvaiita sei zvomotinyadzisa? Cde vakati Ndiri kupindura question no 5 yakanzi answer in brief!!!

Chiyi chadonha?

mkwasha akaenda kwa ambuya vake ndokunzi naambuya mkwasha maita mauya sungirirai satelite dish, mkwasha nekunyara kuti haagone akakwira pamsoro pemba pasina nguva ambuya vakanzwa pasi kurira zvine mutsindo, ambuya vakabvunza mkwasha kuti chii chadonha, mkwasha akati ihovhorosi zvikanzi na ambuya ine mutsindo kudaro, mkwasha akati ndiri mukati mayo.

Panofa pfambi panonzwinyi?

Pakafa mufundisi takarara tichiimba nekuparidza. Pakafa hwindi takarara tichimbeya nemakombi pachiridzwa mabhero nekushevedzerwa. Nhasi pafa mai susan pfambi tiri kurara tichiitei nhasi guyz

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